Don't you just love mothers...I know I do.

Okay, so I know it's been a while. I have had zero motivation to do anything. Really. I've had raging headaches and the extreme need to be in a constant state of nappishness. And yes, I just said nappishness.

Anyway, My Mom is coming into town today. Tomorrow is my birthday, and my husband and I have plans to go see the midnight showing of Harry Potter 5 tonight. So I asked my Mom to drive 4 hours (three and a half for her, because she drives like a bat out of hell) to come "watch" Adrien while we're out tonight. I mean, he'll be asleep the whole time...it's such hard work for her, I'm sure. So anywho, on with my story: She calls me this morning and asks if she can have lunch with her Mary Kay sales director (yes, she sells Mary Kay -- ugh) tomorrow at Mary Kay Corporate. Tomorrow of all days. It went a little like this: (Yes, note my cattiness. But honestly, I had a right. Right?)

My Mom starts by very passive aggressively asking, "So I know Andrew has taken off of work tomorrow...does he have anything planned for your birthday tomorrow?" [Andrew is my husband, btw]

"No, not that I know of. I mean, we're seeing Harry Potter tonight and that's about it. We don't really have the money to go do anything else very extravagant."

"Oh, well maybe I'll just call Andrew and ask him."

"No, Mom. I'm really pretty sure we're just doing the movie tonight."

"Well, I mean, he did take off tomorrow."

"Ya, he took off so he wouldn't be tired after watching a three or four hour movie at midnight! But why do you ask?"

"Well, Tanya wants to take me to lunch at corporate sometime and I thought tomorrow would be great."

"Well if you don't want to see me on my birthday, I understand."

And then my Mom kicks it in hard core, "SEE! YOU MAKE IT SO HARD FOR ME TO DO ANYTHING BUSINESS RELATED WHEN I COME TO DALLAS!!! I CAN NEVER DO ANYTHING BECAUSE YOU GET SOOOO JEALOUS!!!"

"I don't get jealous. It's my BIRTHDAY!"

I mean, really. That was the conversation. She got off the phone all huffy and acted like the "I love you" at the end of the conversation was forced. I mean, am I wrong to get a little upset that she'd want to drive all the way across town on my birthday to have lunch with her friend/sales director? She'd be gone for a good two or three hour jaunt just for that. Not to mention that she moves slower than Methuselah in the morning, so by the time she got up and drank her pot of coffee, I'd get very little social time with her before she shot off to discuss the goddess that runs her life, AKA, Mary Kay. On top of it, I haven't seen her since Adrien's birthday in May. AND, in addition to all of that, she was originally going to come up yesterday and stay until Thursday morning. Then her trip suddenly got shortened to being here this afternoon and then leaving tomorrow evening.

Now she's magically back to staying until Thursday morning and then leaving from here to go have lunch with Tanya on Thursday.

After our little argument this morning, Andi (my husband) got a call from her not even 10 minutes later. I'm assuming she was asking about his plans for me tomorrow...which are of course NONE. But She also berated him with the usual questions about why we never drive four hours down there to see her. And, he also said she tried to get him in the middle of our little feud while complaining about my supposed "jealousy" to him. He says he refuses to get in the middle. It's fine -- I know he's on my side anyway.

So then not even thirty minutes later, she calls me all cheery and happy and announces she has some great idea to pick us up sushi on the way over so we can have a late lunch. I can't tell her I'm pregnant yet, because I'm waiting to do it in person...so I just insisted she bring me the California Rolls with zero sashimi...I really do love sashimi though.

So everything is peachy keen to her now, I suppose. I really don't understand her sometimes. She'll be here anywhere between the next 30 minutes to an hour. Yay.

So anyway, other than that, I haven't been up to much. Fourth of July was sort of fun. It was a little dreary and drizzley out. My SIL, Aerobics Barbie, was there. She ate her hamburger with no bun, thank you. I mean, Carbs Kill, right?

We went to the mall twice last week for play dates and then we were right back at the mall today for another one. I really do get sick of the mall, but it's been raining nearly every day here lately. On top of it, if it's not raining, it's basically a sauna outside.

I saw "Sheila" at the mall today. She was looking as gaunt as ever. She informed, again, that she'd formed a new play group and left the old one. I guess she forgot about our meeting at Target. Maybe it's the heroine or lack of calories consumed. It was very strange for two mommy groups to be meeting at the mall at the same time. It was almost like some strange cliquish competition. There was one of our members who was attending that is also a member of their group. Strange.

We went to another pot luck yesterday. It was very strange, indeed. It was held, last minute, at a new member's house. I think only one person from our group had met her previously. She's lived here in Dallas for only 4 weeks. When the original hostess was unable to host due to a death in the family, this girl piped up and offered her house up. I think she must be a robot. Her house was perfectly unpacked and in order for just being there for only 4 weeks. As an assistant organizer of our little play group, I wondered if this woman knew what she was getting herself into when she offered to host the pot luck. Apparently she did not. She has a four (nearly five) year old. Nothing was baby proofed. She had no ice for the drinks. She had only a few paper plates to eat off of. She had no plastic cups or flatware of any sort. There was nowhere for anyone to sit at. Everyone sat with their toddlers, trying to feed them on the floor. That worked out soooo great for Adrien...(sarcasm...) I was ready to leave.

Well Adrien is now awake and my Mother will be here shortly. I really have to go...as if this post isn't long enough. I promise not to hold you all in suspense for that long of a time again.