Wordless Wednesday: Look what I made!

Respect MY Authority

This past weekend we went to Dallas for the Neiman Marcus Adolphus Children's Parade. It was fun, but holy poopsicles, was it ever cold. We got downtown at 8 or something and the parade didn't even start until 10. It was worth it though! Once the parade started, I forgot how cold I was. Did I mention Jude slept through the entire thing? Ya. Marching bands and all. And we were front and center. I wish he would sleep that deep all the time.

Jude's been sleeping horribly the past few weeks. At first I thought it was his stomach with solids. So I'd cut out solid foods and he was still crying through the night. I can tell he's been in pain, so I finally took him into the doctor to see what was wrong. I was fearing an ear infection in his left ear, and I was right. I've been frustrated about finding a new doctor here in Tyler because I was so happy with our doc back in Dallas. I managed to find an osteopathic pediatrician at a local clinic not too far from our house and I was trying to remain optimistic. She looked nice in her photo and I was hoping the D.O. that followed her name meant she would be a little more liberal on some issues. Mainly on the vaccines.

When I told her my doctor in Dallas wasn't for vaccines she looked at me like I was insane and let me know that she would be willing to "work" with me on the schedule, but wouldn't be willing to see me if I wasn't working toward vaccinating. That seems to be the consensus I've gotten from doctors in this tiny little town. Fine, I'll take what I can get, and I'm guessing that means a doctor that will only allow a delayed schedule. It's not the fact that I'm being forced into vaccinating that bothers me as much as her reasoning behind it. She said, and I do quote;

...If you choose not to move toward vaccinating at all, I would be afraid that you wouldn't respect my authority on other issues...

Authority? AUTHORITY? I mean, who died and made you mother to my children? Since when did doctors become the be all and end all of authority in our childrens' lives? I get that I have no medical degree. But what I get even more is my children and when I know what feels right for them and what doesn't. Is it even right for a doctor to act as if a parent has no authority in their child's life? What she should be respecting is my authority as a parent.

I've caught flack for my stance on vaccinations before. But what's the world coming to when you're afraid to take your child to the doctor because of an informed medical decision you've made regarding their welfare? I was told by another pediatrician here in town that he, too, would have to refuse to see my children in his office if I put off vaccinating Jude after four months of age.

It's just unsettling.

You know what else is unsettling? The fact that I don't think I've brushed my teeth today.

As requested....

Diapers and Schooling

It's been forever since I posted. I'm so bad about that. I really need to try to get better. Props to all those bloggers who have multiple children in the preschool years and still get a daily blog up. I mean, really. It just boggles my mind. Blogging time used to come easily when it was just Adrien...just turn on some telly and I was good for like 20 minutes at least. Jude just doesn't get that whole zone out to the t.v. thing yet.

Speaking of the telly, I'm quite sure my kid(s) watch too much...you see, I'm already anticipating Jude watching too much as well. I was the mom who was never going to let my kid watch that much television. Really, I was. Then, when Adrien was a few weeks old, I discovered that he'd stop crying for a few minutes to let me get some dishes done if he was in front of the moving color box. Call me a bad mom or whatever, but I really needed those few scream-less minutes. And then it was that easy. Not that I let my infant really watch t.v...but when he was a little older we'd put it on Disney every morning. Oh how I miss the days of watching the Today Show...

And now it's like just the norm. We turn on cartoons in the morning, and since I've had Jude, it's sort of like my crutch. At least a few times a week (if not every day some weeks) I catch myself turning on Wow Wow Wubbzy reruns I've TiVo'd just to catch a cat nap while Jude takes his morning nap. And then some days that ends up turning into an all day occurrence (not the napping part, unfortunately). It's like ohmigoodness I need some breathing room, LOOK! there's Spongebob, finally I can get a minute of sanity. So I am really trying to work on that whole using the television as a crutch thing. You know I'm not the only mom. Don't look at me like that. Judge me, bitch, just try.

In jest though. But seriously, I got my new cloth diaper order today! Can we say exciting? I can. Exciting. I ordered some new covers because Jude's chunky little self moved up into a new size quite a while ago, we've just been stretching by with what the had. I decided to try a new kind of cover since the others I had were bulky (and expensive). I tried these ones out and I'm so happy so far! They're not bulky at all, and best of all you get TWO for only FIVE BUCKS!!! (That's compared to only one cover for close to $12 or $15). I also ordered some new prefolds for him since he's long since outgrown his infant sized ones (we've been living on some hand me down fitted diapers). They're absolutely GINORMOUS! And best of all, I finally broke down and ordered a BumGenius 3.0 one-size diaper. These are like cutting edge in the cloth diaper world. I've so coveted them, but have been too cheap to order until now. I finally allowed myself to order one because it was on sale and it was Black Friday. I sense an addiction coming on.

I've also been starting to think about schooling. I can't believe that in just two and a half more short years we'll be starting Adrien in school. I want to start the whole preschool experience soon. He's at an age where he's picking up on new concepts easily, and I feel now's the time to let that budding genius loose. In all seriousness though, I'd like to start him in a preschool when he's closer to three, but I realize we most likely won't have the money to put him into one I'd like. So I was checking around town for a preschool co-op. There is one that is ran through a homeschool co-op, and I was very excited to learn that...until I found out you have to have at least one school-aged child to enroll your children into the program. So that stinks. So I could enroll Adrien for Kindergarten when he's old enough and Jude would get the preschool benefit. That doesn't exactly do much for Adrien. So I'm going to keep checking. But I was talking to Andi about it and telling him how excited I was about the co-op thing and he asked me if I wanted to homeschool. So that set off a spark in my head. And now I'm researching that too. I am eager to get my adult life back, complete with a job and all, but education is very important to me. I don't want my children to be poorly educated by the public school system. On the other hand, I don't want them to miss anything socially by not going to public schools. I would adore a private school, but I'm being realistic and we probably won't be able to afford that either.

Get excited! I have my MOPS meeting tomorrow. We've started attending the church I got to the MOPS group at and we love it so far. It's quite a bit larger than what we're used to, and we're attending the contemporary worship which differs greatly from the strongly liturgical Presbyterian church we'd been attending in Dallas. But the music at the service is superb, and unlike some contemporary worship services we've been to, the music doesn't stretch on and on. I'm feeling like I'm missing something in my life right now and I can't quite put my finger on it. I'm thinking it's a strong sense of church home. Hopefully we'll be fully settled in the new church soon. We're trying out a Sunday School class this Sunday. Let's see how that goes.

We're going to be going back to Dallas this weekend to see a friend and go to the big Christmas parade they have there. I hope the weather's mild and not too terribly cold. I can't wait to see my friend! It's been too long already and I miss her a great deal.

Dallas, here we come! :)

I am what I think I am

God called me lazy today.

For the last while, and especially this week, I've been moping around feeling pretty sorry for myself. I haven't been getting dressed. I haven't been cleaning. I've been flat out sour.

Today I had a meeting with the local MOPS group I've joined. It was Christmas craft day and my day was brightened even more because my Mother in law was taking care of my two year old. I was left with only one child in-tow and I'd gotten his feeding schedule just-so this morning as to not disturb my 10am to noon crafting session. I was going to drop my baby off in the nursery at church, go my meeting, drink coffee and act like the refreshed mother I'm not. But it was going to be wonderful.

And it was.

Until I was Convicted.

The devotional this morning was on Proverbs 31:10-31.

10 [c] A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.

12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.

14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.

15 She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.

16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.

18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.

19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.

26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:

29 "Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

31 Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Okay, God. I hear You loud and clear. I'm getting dressed tomorrow. I did the dishes this afternoon.

Letting the dog from the leash

The kitchen is full of dishes. Some left from Sunday's party, some from other times. Until earlier today, the dining room table still held three dirty plates from dinner last night...one being my husband's over half full of old spaghetti. I'd upset him too much to eat, I guess. I was having another mid-week meltdown and giving him the what-for about my isolated life as a full time Mom.

I haven't gotten dressed all week, save for on Monday when we attempted to have a great day at the zoo. We had a day there, anyway. Today I sat on my bed on pins and needles as Adrien slept in the living room and Jude lay on my bed napping. The last shower I had was Saturday morning before a friend's baby shower. Still, it was nap time and I'd chosen first and foremost to dig into a book that had come for me in today's mail. Dishes and hygiene be damned, because this book was about finding yourself in the depths of motherhood.

Not even one chapter in and a dog started to yip outside my bedroom window. Banging from above. The trophy wife of the doctor who lives above me is home and she'd put her dandy little doggie out to doodie. I can still hear her high heels clicking around on the hardwood floor. She's so privileged...and she can't even drag her high heeled self out to walk her dog? I felt like walking right up to her door, pounding on it and giving her the run around about her dog waking my child up during precious, precious nap time.

But how would I look to this pampered picture of perfection? So instead, I picked up the crying baby and came to the computer to write this.

Anybody out there?

We've been in the sticks now for a few weeks. I get like zero time to do anything...odd since you'd think I'd have more time (seeing as I'm living with my in-laws). But the internet here is slower than Methuselah...they live so far out in the middle of nowhere, that just to get internet -- other than dial up (people still have that?) -- is satellite. Slower. Than. Methuselah.


We found a place to move into, but the kitchen is being remodeled right now and it won't be ready until November 1. Which is fine. It's a duplex built in the 1930s, and all in all we'll have more square footage in the duplex than we did in our house back in the city. We'll be living downstairs from a doctor. It's in the nicest neighborhood in town. Can't wait to have my own space. And OH. My. Goodness...my king size bed. Four people sleeping in a bed that's supposedly queen size...it's like we're sardines, really.

We went back to Dallas about two weeks ago to turn the keys over to our new tenants. We went a day early...only to discover the house had been broken into sometime the previous week. The back door was kicked in. And I guess they had a temper. They kicked a hole in the hallway wall. I assume it's because they only made off with a cheap electric drill. At the end of it we were left with a hundred dollar hotel bill for the night, cops who took no fingerprints, etc. and major repairs to be done -- the day our new lessors were to move in. Very, very exciting...and odd to see someone else moving their things into my house. A bit heartbreaking...but I'm trying to remain optimistic.

Andi loves his new job so far. Let's keep the momentum going. I'll blog again when I get a chance. I'm going to be doing a redesign and a possible URL switch soon, but that will likely not be until after we get into our own place.

I'm so bored with this blog. Do I even have any readers anymore?